Monday, January 12, 2015

TLC could have called it 'Scared Straight: Mormon'

The first thing that one needs to know about TLC's “My Husband's Not Gay” is that one must subordinate social science to superstition — down to the magic underwear. The second thing is that these guys are wed not only to women but to a language of convenience; semantics that exist only in conservative Christian circles.

You won't find “SSA” in the DSM. “Same-sex attraction” and “SSA” are contrivances. Those terms only exist in order to assert that one is not homosexual if they do not have sex with other men. As for “gay,” that's just something that they dismiss as a lifestyle. In point of fact the continuum that comprises sexual orientation has nothing to do with how, or with whom, people have sex. These people get their sociology from Mormon bishops.

Once you get past the bullshit and accept the fact that these are gay or bisexual men one has to appreciate just how much pressure these guys must bear. It goes well beyond religion because their entire social structure ceases to exist if they are gay. Gay men in Mormon culture lose everything; often their employment and their families. It's a powerful incentive to pretend to be something that they are not. This demonstrates the potential toxicity of religion. Remove the LDS and these men would probably be much happier having relationships with other men.

And what about the women who knowingly marry gay men? Assuming that there is at least some loss of intimacy it seems that they are marrying a friend rather than someone with whom they have a romantic attraction.

So what's the harm? After all it's just reality TV — cable chewing gum. This is the same “learning” channel that airs Long Island Medium. The short answer is that I would not want a gay teen to think that conformity is more important than being who they really are. Nobody should do what these people are doing. No one should have to. This particular closet may have a glass door but it is still a closet. The potential consequences (for both participants) of a gay man marrying a woman are considerable. It's not a healthy arrangement. Add a kid or two and things get even more In all likelihood they are marrying into a lifestyle in contrast to a romantic interest.  complicated.

These are the same folks who think that a gay couple raising a child is a form of abuse. Yet an intellectually and emotionally dishonest marital arrangement doesn't seem to cause them a great deal of concern. Indeed they seem to encourage these couplings. “One less fag” I suppose.

The saddest part of all of this might be the collective stress of the wives. They seem insecure and on guard that their husbands might find a male sexual interest. Just how neurotic are these people?

What a waste of an hour and a few thousand brain cells.In all likelihood they are marrying into a lifestyle in contrast to a romantic interest. 

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