Thursday, September 24, 2020

Christian Convert: "If Enough Believers Pray in Tongues, This Country Can Turn Around"

“Is there an association of board-certified prophets or do we just take their word for it?”
Sid Roth
Sid Roth | via Charisma

Speaking in tongues has the religious authenticity of snake handling. Of course most snake handlers eventually become corpses. Those who speak in tongues have fewer direct consequences arising from their hobby.

Speaking in tongues originated with the notion that when the Apostles spoke, each person heard their message in their own language. Linguists have studies speaking in tongues and generally believe that people make up words from sounds that form patterns consistent with their own language.

A scholar is not required to recognize that speaking in tongues produces gibberish that neither the speaker nor any listeners understand. The Jewish swinging chicken ritual doesn't make much sense either.

Sid Roth might have some swung chickens in his background. That is, before he converted to Christianity and embraced speaking in tongues. Roth was interviewed by Stephen Strang, avid Trump supporter, Charismatic Christian and all-around whack job:
Sid told me that this Sunday, Sept. 27, at 9:30 p.m. Eastern Time, his network will release a special broadcast … called Repentance, Trump and Tongues. He chose Yom Kippur … because as he explains, it's "the holiest day on the Jewish calendar … And I felt that was a point of contact, to touch the Lord, to touch God and to spare our nation."
Sid, bubbie, if our nation needs to be spared it is from Trump; not for Trump. I am sure that Sid is a big hit with his family.
Prophets — Ye Shall Assemble!
Sid gathered a group of prophets to join him for this special broadcast and said, "On this show, we're going to only do two things. We're going to pray perfect prayers with perfect faith. And the only way to do that is to pray in supernatural languages. And we're going to allow the Holy Spirit to prophesy. And of course, at Yom Kippur, you have the shofar blast, which according to rabbinic and biblical [teaching], grabs God's attention. ... And Steve, I can tell you this: If enough Christians pray in tongues, this country can turn around."
The above serves as proof that speaking in tongues is not a required element of spouting gibberish. Who are these prophets? Is there an association of board-certified prophets or do we just take their word for it? If someone comes up to me and claims to be a prophet I might be just a tad skeptical.

Poor Sid. He wants to retain his Jewish identity:
"I'm not only praying perfect faith; I'm praying the prayers from heaven that God wants on earth. ... I don't have time not to pray in tongues, perfect prayers, all from heaven," Sid said. "Perfect faith, 100% percent faith, praying the will of God. I'm even driving the devil meshuga, that's a Yiddish-Hebrew word that means 'crazy.' I'm driving the devil crazy. He doesn't even know what I'm praying, and then all of a sudden, slam-bam, all these things are happening," he said.
The correct word is meshuggeneh and it is not really a “Yiddish-Hebrew” word. It is Yiddish which is essentially 9th century High German with Hebrew text and Hebrew influences (along with Aramaic and Slavic seasonings).
Let me try to follow the logic
  1. This country needs to be turned around.
  2. Turning it around requires divine intervention.
  3. God is capable of effecting this transition.
  4. For some reason God refuses to do so unless we pray to him.
  5. Ordinary prayers won't do.
  6. God will only listen to prayers in a made-up language that the speaker does not understand.
  7. Therefore, the prayers of Pentecostal Christians are required.
Forgive my pragmatism. Turning this country around requires us to get rid of Donald Trump. That does not require prayers. That does not require religion. Prophets need not apply. That requires people of all faiths, and no faith at all, to vote in November.

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